Reversed (Side A) [on indefinite hiatus], a pokéjinka story. |
Sep 9 2009, 04:57 AM
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#1121
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Pokémon Trainer Group: Members Posts: 17 Joined: 18-May 09 Member No.: 24 482 Active Squad |
I would love it if you spent more time on panels and revamping and the like. I know one problem I had was keeping track, because the story jumps around a lot. Not that this is a bad thing, it's just hard to keep track of. I'm not meaning to diss you or anything, but the main one that made me backtrack a little and go "Huh?" Was the part when they were being rescued underwater, seemed like a big part of that was cut out. Made me go, "Wait, did they just get rescued? What?"
Keep up the good work, though! I am loving it so far. |
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Sep 9 2009, 09:24 AM
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#1122
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I'm different... Group: +Donors Posts: 491 Joined: 6-May 09 From: Aperture Laboratories Member No.: 20 006 Active Squad |
I would love it if you spent more time on panels and revamping and the like. :3 I know one problem I had was keeping track, because the story jumps around a lot. Not that this is a bad thing, it's just hard to keep track of. I'm not meaning to diss you or anything, but the main one that made me backtrack a little and go "Huh?" Was the part when they were being rescued underwater, seemed like a big part of that was cut out. Made me go, "Wait, did they just get rescued? What?" Keep up the good work, though! I am loving it so far. Unfortunately I'm not going to actually change story progression very much - after some thinking, that'd just be really confusing to people who've already read it. The story does jump around a lot, because I can't stick to the same thing for very long, or I'd lose interest. I guess a jumpy story is better than no story! As for the part about being rescued underwater - there was no rescue at all. Everyone left the cave on their own through a hidden exit which Gyarados mentions and Milotic remembered. Edit: Chapter 6 and 7 recaps! Since I hurt my hand again and all fff me. This post has been edited by Shirogane: Sep 9 2009, 10:47 AM -------------------- |
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Sep 9 2009, 12:47 PM
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#1123
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I'm different... Group: +Donors Posts: 491 Joined: 6-May 09 From: Aperture Laboratories Member No.: 20 006 Active Squad |
0625-0628 (click to show ) Ahh expect no more updates today. :( Hand still hurts and I'm having other things troubling me as well ffff. -------------------- |
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Sep 9 2009, 02:09 PM
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#1124
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Attracted 2 Aron Group: Members Posts: 73 Joined: 5-June 09 From: USA Member No.: 31 019 Aron Army |
EDIT: *Facepalm* Never mind Jumped the gun. This post has been edited by Cloudy past: Sep 9 2009, 02:12 PM -------------------- |
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Sep 9 2009, 03:10 PM
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#1125
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I'm different... Group: +Donors Posts: 491 Joined: 6-May 09 From: Aperture Laboratories Member No.: 20 006 Active Squad |
EDIT: *Facepalm* Never mind Jumped the gun. Haha, no worries. I had to check the order of events myself when writing the recaps. :'> -------------------- |
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Sep 9 2009, 09:03 PM
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#1126
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What? You want me to put something sily? Well, okay, I like chee Group: Members Posts: 248 Joined: 2-July 09 From: Earth Member No.: 41 671 Cheez program |
Is that Mari who's covering his mouth or is that someone?
-------------------- Don't steal my avatar please. It was made by me.
http://leafears5838.deviantart.com/ <- My deviant account page. Enjoy Banner made by RedWolfen Other adoptables (click to show ) |
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Sep 9 2009, 10:01 PM
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#1127
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Pokémon Trainer Group: Newbies Posts: 1 Joined: 18-May 09 Member No.: 24 486 Active Squad |
I like the series myself too, just like Raine said, it jumps around a lil bit, the cave thing I read three times to figure it out, yes they knew about it, but it was just *Poof* We are out now, surprise! But most part its good. =3
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Sep 9 2009, 10:10 PM
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#1128
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Super Nerd Group: Members Posts: 360 Joined: 5-April 09 From: The United States Member No.: 8 333 A nice set indeed |
I like that the story is a bit jumpy. It makes more opportunities for new characters to appear and it removes some downtime more contiguous stories have.
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Sep 9 2009, 11:31 PM
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#1129
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I'm different... Group: +Donors Posts: 491 Joined: 6-May 09 From: Aperture Laboratories Member No.: 20 006 Active Squad |
Is that Mari who's covering his mouth or is that someone? That's Ray himself covering his own mouth in an "oops" kind of way. Also, I've explained why the story is jumpy here. In a nutshell, we don't edit this story or plan it in advance. It's 100% spontaneous, and updated as we make it. When you read it day-by-day, it's much easier to understand than if you read the whole thing at once, or miss lots of updates. Reading a few panels a day gives you enough time for the information presented to "settle" before you move on - because the pacing is so frantic, reading it all at once is too much information in too little time, in a sense. But we like it that way, and that's how it's staying. We're always available to answer questions about the story if anyone has them, and the recaps are also there to help if you get lost. -------------------- |
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Sep 9 2009, 11:52 PM
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#1130
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Pokémon Trainer Group: Members Posts: 17 Joined: 18-May 09 Member No.: 24 482 Active Squad |
Have you ever thought about adding the comments at the bottom of the webpage, just like you do in the forums? Just thinking of those who will come across your website and not know about the forums at all. :9
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Sep 10 2009, 10:15 AM
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#1131
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I'm different... Group: +Donors Posts: 491 Joined: 6-May 09 From: Aperture Laboratories Member No.: 20 006 Active Squad |
Have you ever thought about adding the comments at the bottom of the webpage, just like you do in the forums? Just thinking of those who will come across your website and not know about the forums at all. :9 That's a problem for two reasons. One, I don't update each page individually, I only upload the images and PHP does the rest - so adding individual comments would require more coding and uploading more files. Plus, I don't really have enough creativity for comments for each panel, and it'd just look strange with comments in just some places. Two, the reading page was designed for no scrolling at 1024x768 resolutions. Comments would cause scrolling. I don't really see why comments would be necessary, anyway! There's the shoutbox for questions if people don't know about the forums, and I wrote recaps for each chapter with additional explanations, plus the FAQ section and whatnot. This post has been edited by Shirogane: Sep 10 2009, 10:16 AM -------------------- |
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Sep 10 2009, 12:10 PM
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#1132
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I'm different... Group: +Donors Posts: 491 Joined: 6-May 09 From: Aperture Laboratories Member No.: 20 006 Active Squad |
Update~
0629-0632 (click to show ) I promise Ray running into Mari's group and this sudden switch to Sharpedo and Gyarados talking are related 8) -------------------- |
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Sep 10 2009, 02:54 PM
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#1133
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Super Nerd Group: Members Posts: 360 Joined: 5-April 09 From: The United States Member No.: 8 333 A nice set indeed |
BOUNTY HUNTERS ARE HUNTING RED GYRADOS FOR BOUNTY
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Sep 10 2009, 06:40 PM
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#1134
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Attracted 2 Aron Group: Members Posts: 73 Joined: 5-June 09 From: USA Member No.: 31 019 Aron Army |
reminds me of my gold/silver days. poor different pokemon... they're just misunderstood...
When the switch happened I was wondering wo was talking then I remembered your comment and I though that was a quick transition. ok enough of my babbling, on with the greatness! ( Though If your hand still hurts, I'd recommend not straining it) on a random note, I love this quote: "A.: You should be yellow. Why aren't you yellow 8( Kadabra: You should be purple with magenta polka dots. Why are you not purple with magenta polka dots?" This post has been edited by Cloudy past: Sep 11 2009, 03:27 PM -------------------- |
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Sep 11 2009, 04:36 PM
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#1135
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I'm different... Group: +Donors Posts: 491 Joined: 6-May 09 From: Aperture Laboratories Member No.: 20 006 Active Squad |
0633-0636 (click to show ) ...Oh shit. -------------------- |
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Sep 11 2009, 04:54 PM
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#1136
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Attracted 2 Aron Group: Members Posts: 73 Joined: 5-June 09 From: USA Member No.: 31 019 Aron Army |
0.0 quite.
What if... he sent those people to get mespirit, that way the bounty hunters could get her(the Gyarados) and then sell her? Cunning. Though I wounder, are those people in robes in connection with the cats? -------------------- |
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Sep 11 2009, 06:06 PM
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#1137
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shloop Group: +Contributor Posts: 266 Joined: 23-June 09 From: U.S.–Illinois Member No.: 37 706 swabbies |
HUH WHAT
Is that Gyarados talking/existing in the last two panels? And is that a Gilgar on the bed? O_o IS THAT A BED -------------------- |
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Sep 11 2009, 06:06 PM
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#1138
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What? You want me to put something sily? Well, okay, I like chee Group: Members Posts: 248 Joined: 2-July 09 From: Earth Member No.: 41 671 Cheez program |
OH NOES! Not Kadabra!
-------------------- Don't steal my avatar please. It was made by me.
http://leafears5838.deviantart.com/ <- My deviant account page. Enjoy Banner made by RedWolfen Other adoptables (click to show ) |
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Sep 11 2009, 06:35 PM
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#1139
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You didn't see anything... Group: Members Posts: 51 Joined: 26-June 09 Member No.: 38 799 Oh sh--... |
I thinks it"s aa Beedrill on the bed (thing).
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Sep 11 2009, 06:45 PM
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#1140
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Kitty Fluff and Smeargle Fan Group: Members Posts: 87 Joined: 28-March 09 From: Lost, very, very lost. Member No.: 6 252 Retype Characters |
Ohcrudohcrudohcrud That is Milotic with a knife approaching a sleeping Kadabra. D8
-------------------- Ivysaur likes sweets. Bayleaf and Quilava likes bitter things. Eggs get warmed. Well well! Look what I managed to snag last minute. o v o;; What? More Clickable things? (click to show ) Squibies (so many, they get their own spoiler!) (click to show ) Stuff I've gotten from other people (click to show ) Credits and Shop Links (click to show ) Be sure to read the front page in all of those shops. |
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